The Tormented Ejaculation | E7 Trad climb

First ascent.

...my own attempts from 1980 have been well wagged about. I call them The Tormented Ejaculation - not just mere climbing, but an expression of the flesh and blood of my work, the poetry of rock-movement inextricably bound up with the network of shape and colour. A last look at the line and a strange impulse took hold of me. I went for it. At 70ft I woke up. Ghastly! The aggression was dissipated and the fear gripped me. I had climbed with no protection and was now eyeballing a tiny shallow crack. I remembered it from the abseil and it had looked pathetic. It was real now. I contemplated jumping on the scree below before the situation got out of control. I fell a million times, my arms unfolding, my breath fading. A no. 1 stopper came to a halt, half-way down this crack, half in, rocking - my weight was on it...the mental preparation was becoming harder and harder. The so-called psyching up, a pain beyond reason. Out of the accquaintance grew more and more fear. Gone the initial naivety that had sparked off this terrifying enterprise. I knew the score and was unnerved by it...I distinctly felt a tiny slide on a friction move lower down and became very insecure, with my feet in canyon boots. I got to the little crack another 20 feet up and was dangerously pumped because of the extra strain on my fingers. The resin was wearing off the boots. I managed to place an RP1, clipped in, and was about to place a No 2 when my right foot shot off.The strain came on the RP, ripped it through, and I cartwheeled a long way down the wall. [3]

[1] https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=115865133203706&set=a.115862679870618

[2] https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=115865649870321&set=a.115862679870618

[3] Clogwyn Du'r Arddu (Climbers' Club Guides) 2004, Nick Dixon